Holy Cow!!!

Yep, it's been quite some time since I've journaled on here!!! I didn't realize how long!! Oh well. That's what happens when you get pregnant and sick!!!

It's a new year! yay! Unfortunately I haven't had time to even THINK about any type of new years resolutions. Altho, I don't normally do them, I do like to have a few goals every year, especially when it comes to exercise and whatnot!!! So I will think of that this week and hopefully get them written down on here soon.

Baby will be 3 weeks old tomorrow! So I haven't been doing any type of exercise yet. It's definitely driving me a little crazy. But I know that it's not time for me to be working out hardcore yet...3 more weeks!! :) I will survive! I did go for a very short walk yesterday and plan to get a walk in every day...to atleast get myself out of the house so I don't go nuts-o!

I have also cut out refined sugars and white flour. I don't eat white flour hardly ever anyway, so that won't be hard. But the sugar thing...hmmm...yeah. HA! The reason is to hopefully combat any post partum depression this go round. I had major issues after Rylie was born. I had my placenta put in capsules after having Charlie and that has done great so far...(if your reading this, and are interested in the benefits of doing this with your placenta, look it up...its AMAZING what the placenta can give you!!!) Of course the holidays for me were bad when it came to sugar. Especially because I just had a baby, and I was in that "I just had a baby so I can eat whatever" stage. I'm definitely glad the holiday junk is outta here!!! There were one too many "overboard" days....

So with cutting out the refined stuff, I am not limiting myself however to not eat any type of sweetener. Like raw honey, pure maple syrup...etc. I'm cutting out the other first...if I feel like that isn't completely working, then I will have to cut out the rest and go from there. For now, I'm okay with having the healthy stuff.

I'm back down to my weight that I was before I got pregnant, but my belly is still here. I'm excited to get back to exercising and get that taken care of!!! I'm trying VERY hard not to focus on it too much right now...I know it takes time for the body to get back...um, especially since this was baby number FIVE! (holy sheesh!!)

I have a few good recipes I'd like to post. Hopefully soon, when I have more time. We have been LOVING lentils around here. We make lentil tacos and we love this recipe for lentil chili too. I crave the lentil chili ALL THE TIME!!! haha. I'll post soon. And hopefully be better at posting this year, for my own sake of course...cz I don't know that anybody even still reads this! ha!

Of Course!

I'm all sorts of behind on my postings. The good news is, I didnt eat after dinner all last week! Until Saturday night. I was very proud of myself, there was a few HARD days!!! Actually should say nights!

This week I totally fell off that rule tho. Monday was hubby's bday, and then we had leftovers from his bday last night. And tonight...well, I'd rather not talk about it. :/

But going from what I did last week, to this week, there's a big difference on what I'm thinking about, where I'm putting my energy, what the kids are focusing on, when we end all eating with dinner. (I don't WANT my kids to expect a treat every night, and of course if I'm having something, then they are too. If they are genuinely hungry, they can have a raw fruit or veggie)

I've been having a bit of trouble w/my right knee when I'm running. It's not making me very happy. I can feel it doing other exercising sometimes too. This is my recovery week for P90X. Did power yoga on monday w/cute hubby (i don't use the one from P90X tho, I have a diff one I use) and yesterday I did Core Synergistics. Man, I was sore this morning from that one!!! Today was kenpo, but I did Taebo cz its basically the same thing. I did run a few miles Monday and Tuesday too, but didn't have the time today!

Tues & Wed

I'm already behind! Some days I just dont have time to get on here and write it all down, let's see if I can remember!

Tuesday:
Exercise: Ran 5 miles outside and Ab workout
Breakfast: I THINK it was my oatmeal/yogurt concoction
Lunch: 6 inch Turkey Sub w/ALL the veggies (from Subway)
Dinner: Family had leftovers, I was still full from the sub (and the handfuls of grain sweetened choc chips...i know, i know...they are healthier BUT they still have calories) so around 630 or 7 i got hungry and just had a few handfuls of baby carrots and then an apple w/almond butter.

Wednesday:
Exercise: P90X Shoulders and Arms, Also walked 2 miles on the treadmill on the highest incline...was all I had time for
Breakfast: oatmeal/yogurt concoction (I crave that EVERY morning, even tho I also love my smoothies)
Lunch: my plan was to have a smoothie or salad. I unfortunately am an idiot sometimes. I SHOULD have made my lunch b4 doing the kids cz I got all their stuff out to make grilled cheese sandwiches, veggies and fruit on the side of course. And I started munching on the carrots, and kept munching on the carrots. Then I cut their bread, and decided to have some bread, ate some of their grapes, etc, etc etc. By the time theirs was done, I had eaten my calories for lunch! So, I didnt make anything else for myself. LaMe i know!!!
Dinner: Mexican Salad....(black or pinto beans, lettuce, cucumbers, bell peppers, olives, corn, green onions...mix it all up w/a vinegrette dressing) Had some baked tortilla chips too.
And of course, there was choc chips in there somewhere during the day!

I have kept to my goal of NO eating after dinner. Altho, last night was HARD. I really wanted ice cream, or yogurt, or something! But i didnt. The end.

Monday 2.21.11

Woke up early and had a good workout. I always feel so GOOD when I wake up early and get my workout in!!! I did P90x, Chest and Back. I am FEELING it, thats for sure!! I did 1 to 3 more reps on every pushup/pullup then I have the last two weeks. My arms were DEAD by the end!!! Felt good to push myself harder. I then ran 3 miles on the treadmill, switching up the incline and speed.

Breakfast: Green smoothie....mango, orange, few frozen strawberries, celery and tons of spinach, ice and water.

Lunch: Huge salad....green leaf lettuce (fresh from the garden), spinach (fresh from ma's garden...ha), red peppers, carrots, tomato, cabbage, celery, zuchini and walnuts, topped w/a homemade vinegrette (sp) dressing from Robyn (Green smoothie girl). And i just realized i forgot the cucumbers on my salad!! I KNEW I was missing something!!! But I love, love, LoVe nuts in salads, so yummy.

Dinner: 3 healthy tacos. Used white corn tortillas, no frying of course. Just stick them on the grill for a few min on each side. I'll have to post the "inside" part of the taco when I have more time!

I did have a few handfuls of grain sweetened choc chips, but nothing after dinner time!

Did Better!

This week I felt so much better about my food choices! I love that!!!

I wanted to start taking pictures of my food again and tracking it better, but alas....I have no batteries for my camera! I was bummed:(

I may still just track my food here...and maybe workouts? Altho, I really do the same workouts, hmmmm, I'll have to think about that.

I have looked into getting a gym membership. So far, I'm not finding anything. Oh well. Maybe I can find some different videos at the library???!!! We shall see! Their selection for workout stuff doesn't seem to be that great.

I have done well with staying away from refined sugars this week! I do have some grain sweetened choc chips in my freezer that I've snacked on more then once, but thats a big step from downing bowls of unhealthy icecream!

I'm hoping that if I can start tracking my food better, it will help w/my portions. I have LoVeD the mixture of yogurt, oatmeal, berries, nuts and cinammon that I learned from Sara. I had that almost every morning this week for breakfast! And I did lots of yummy salads for lunch. Late afternoon, dinner and night-time are my HARDEST times for snacking and wanting FOOD!!!!

Personal goal for this week: NO EATING AFTER DINNER. Its gonna be a tough one, but I know I can do it!!! I better inform my husband so he doesnt try to tempt me. ;) I realize tho, that I'm more apt to go to bed early, spend more time w/my hubby, when I'm not focusing on "what treat can i have now that the kids are in bed???" I like that feeling better.

With doing P90X again, I'm loving how my arms are looking. I almost said a negative to that positive statement, but I caught myself! I want to be happy with that. I am really, really, REALLY working on being happy with myself again. Knowing that I am a strong woman and tho my body isnt perfect, and has flaws....I can love myself just as much as my husband does and my children do. Working out, eating right, IS important to me. But I'm not perfect but am doing the best I can in my life right now.

I am looking for a race to run in the spring. Even if its just a 10k. Its been far too long. OH!!! I ran 6 miles on saturday and it felt GrEaT!!!

Ho Hum....

Me again.

Good news: I ran 4.5 miles OuTsIdE today!! Wahoo!!!

Bad news is, I just ate a big fat bowl of icecream....for the hmmmm...let's see....THIRD time this week.

It was a perfect day for running. I'm glad I took advantage.

Sugar is getting to me. Sweets are getting to me. Why must I have this problem??? Why must I want it ALL the time...I hate it. I keep telling myself that we are going to do NO refined sugars, candy, etc. We will be strictly doing homemade treats w/raw sugar, coconut sugar, etc.

I think it's TiMe!

Side note: I went to a gym today, to get prices on joining. Why can't they just charge 5 bucks a month???!!!!! Boo

I am not perfect....

I have learned alot about myself the last few weeks. I am not perfect....and the awesome thing is, thats OKAY.

You see, I have a problem. A problem with comparing myself with others. I have had this problem for as long as I can remember. And most especially since having my cute little Rylie-Jane. I love her....and I'm learning to love the fact that my body is NOT the same since having her.

Yes I am thin, but I still have a belly. And Yes, people are going to say, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT??? But I'm writing this for me, not you.

Ahem...

I try REALLY, REALLY hard to eat healthy. I am very picky about what my kids do and do not eat. I am very happy about this. I want to give them the best things for their bodies. Sometimes I do great at this, and sometimes I dont...and you know what, thats OKAY. Sometimes I choose great meals for myself, and sometimes I don't. But knowing that the good meals outweight the not so good...I'm okay with that.

The last few weeks have been hard. I've been sick, kids have been sick, things have been crazy around here. I have done my best to give everyone what they need, sometimes its worked, and sometimes it hasnt...and you know what? you guessed it...thats okay.

What is this thing I have with comparing myself to others? I need and should be happy with where I'm at. Just because this person does X, doesn't mean I need to do Y and Z. I need to find the "happy balance" thats just right for me and for my family.

My body is not perfect...and no, it won't ever be. But I wonder where I draw the line? I LOVE MY BODY, IT SERVES ME WELL. That is still all over my house. And I'm grateful for it. It helps me to remember. I don't like looking in the mirror and having bad thoughts about myself. I need to be happy with where I'm at (haven't I said that before) and continue on my journey.

That being said, (is anybody listening???) I miss running. Especially OUTSIDE. Life has gotten in the way. I have not been able to do a race for over a year, that makes me sad. And it's not because I don't run, its because I just haven't had the extra money to participate. I miss being in races...I miss having a schedule to go by. I have been thinking about running alot lately. I love the feelings that I have when I run. I hope to get back in my groove soon.

Life with 4 kids is busy. Life with 4 kids and homeschooling is busy. Life with 4 kids, homeschooling, piano and a husband is busy. Life with all of that...PLUS doing my best in exercise and healthy eating is BUSY. Sometimes I will do great and other times I wont. I need to be okay with that, and quit the guilty feeling business. I have a great body and my husband and children love me for who I am. Cant I love MYSELF that much too????

Do I have to have 6 pack abs to love myself as much as they do?